{"PaperName": "The Calculating Acorn", "Stories": [{"HeadlineId": "a47c9fe2", "Headline": "FSB Announces Plague Fully Contained, Along With Everyone Who Mentioned It", "OriginalHeadline": "Russia Moves to Tamp Down Rumors About Plague Outbreak in Siberia", "ShowOriginal": false, "Angle": "dark satire: security services as containment", "AngleSetup": "State the uncomfortable truth that Russia's real outbreak-control tool is the security apparatus, not medicine. The FSB and the Prosecutor General announce the outbreak is fully 'contained,' because the patients, the doctors and the people who mentioned it have all been contained. Quarantine and detention become the same word.", "Rank": 1, "YearMonthDay": "20261005", "StoryId": "1c49n", "Description": "The country\u2019s consumer watchdog has said only that \u201can employee of an anti-plague institute in the Irkutsk Region\u201d contracted pneumonia. Rumors and unconfirmed reports sounded a more ominous note.\n\n[Photo: An infectious-diseases hospital in the town of Shelekhov, Russia, on Monday. The mayor has urged residents \u201cnot to spread rumors.\u201d]", "Url": "https://www.nytimes.com/2026/10/05/world/europe/russia-plague-siberia.html", "ImageUrl": "https://static01.nyt.com/images/2026/10/05/multimedia/05Russia-Plague-wkgf/05Russia-Plague-wkgf-mediumSquareAt3X.jpg", "Source": "nytimes.com", "PublishedAt": "2026-10-05T15:49:14+00:00", "SiblingHeadlines": [{"HeadlineId": "a47c9fe2", "Headline": "FSB Announces Plague Fully Contained, Along With Everyone Who Mentioned It", "Angle": "dark satire: security services as containment", "Rank": 1, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "0094c7e2", "Headline": "Local Man Detained for Reporting Dead Rat, Rat Released Pending Further Rumors", "Angle": "pun on 'rat out' / plague rats", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "06db2a2f", "Headline": "Officials Report '3.6 Buboes, Not Great, Not Terrible'", "Angle": "pop culture: HBO's Chernobyl '3.6 roentgen'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "11cd010e", "Headline": "New Siberian Policy: See a Plague Rat, Say Nothing, Become One", "Angle": "pun on 'rat out' / plague rats", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "124d60aa", "Headline": "Russian Officials Repeat Word 'Pneumonia' Until It Stops Meaning Anything", "Angle": "deadpan profanity: consumer watchdog statement", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "1bb649db", "Headline": "Anti-Plague Institute Clarifies: Death Benefits Only Apply If You Die of the Thing in Your Job Title", "Angle": "format-borrowing: HR redundancy memo", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "25431971", "Headline": "Officials Say Situation Is Stable, Citing the Suspicious Stillness of Everyone Involved", "Angle": "dark satire: security services as containment", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "3234feed", "Headline": "Russia Clarifies: Quarantine and Detention Are the Same Word Now", "Angle": "dark satire: security services as containment", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "3ad5b422", "Headline": "HR Memo: Position Eliminated Due to 'Restructuring,' Not Due to the Plague We Pay You to Fight", "Angle": "format-borrowing: HR redundancy memo", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "3efc1fed", "Headline": "Irkutsk Pneumonia Patient Reads '3.6,' Device Not Rated Any Higher", "Angle": "pop culture: HBO's Chernobyl '3.6 roentgen'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "6ad7610a", "Headline": "Employee Status Updated to 'Redundant'; Cause Listed as Pneumonia to Dodge Hazard Pay Clause", "Angle": "format-borrowing: HR redundancy memo", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "754854d2", "Headline": "Anti-Plague Institute Employee Has 'Pneumonia,' Officials Say, Eyes Watering From the Lie", "Angle": "deadpan profanity: consumer watchdog statement", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "8a300e66", "Headline": "Consumer Watchdog Confirms 'Pneumonia,' Advises Nation Not to Look Under the Fucking Bandage", "Angle": "deadpan profanity: consumer watchdog statement", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "9f3188d6", "Headline": "Watchdog Group Stands By 'Pneumonia' Diagnosis, Declines to Explain the Quarantine Tents", "Angle": "deadpan profanity: consumer watchdog statement", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "a4cce5ce", "Headline": "Prosecutor General Confirms Outbreak Under Control, Three Doctors Still Being Controlled", "Angle": "dark satire: security services as containment", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "ab41a059", "Headline": "Shelekhov Mayor: Ratting Out Rats Now Punishable, Rats Themselves Still Innocent Until Proven Infected", "Angle": "pun on 'rat out' / plague rats", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "c7bf1462", "Headline": "Consumer Watchdog Insists Bubo Count Steady At Maximum Possible 3.6", "Angle": "pop culture: HBO's Chernobyl '3.6 roentgen'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "f77f2f55", "Headline": "Officials Clarify: It's Not a Plague Cover-Up, It's Just Illegal to Rat on Rats", "Angle": "pun on 'rat out' / plague rats", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "f85ffa1a", "Headline": "Plague-Meter Caps Out At 3.6, Scientists Shrug 'Could Be Worse'", "Angle": "pop culture: HBO's Chernobyl '3.6 roentgen'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "fe2b3b87", "Headline": "Irkutsk Anti-Plague Institute Employee 'Made Redundant,' Hazard Bonus Forfeited on Pneumonia Technicality", "Angle": "format-borrowing: HR redundancy memo", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}]}, {"HeadlineId": "d4edab8f", "Headline": "Measles Endorses Paxton, Cites 'Steady Leadership' and Open-Door Policy in West Texas", "OriginalHeadline": "Texas Pediatricians Face Paxton Investigations for Vaccinating Children", "ShowOriginal": true, "Angle": "Reversal: Measles endorses Paxton", "AngleSetup": "Treat the measles virus as a grateful constituent formally endorsing Paxton's Senate run. It praises his 'steady leadership' and 'solid record' of protecting its access to unvaccinated children in West Texas, where it has already buried two. Write it as a straight campaign press release, so the virus is the only honest stakeholder in the race.", "Rank": 7, "YearMonthDay": "20261005", "StoryId": "jmbx6", "Description": "Ken Paxton, the Texas attorney general and Republican Senate candidate, has alleged a sprawling profit-driven conspiracy. Pediatricians say the accusations are an attempt at intimidation.\n\n[Photo: Dr. Rachel examining a patient in Texas last month.]", "Url": "https://www.nytimes.com/2026/10/05/health/ken-paxton-pediatricians-vaccines.html", "ImageUrl": "https://static01.nyt.com/images/2026/10/01/multimedia/XXDC-Pediatrician-vaccines-top-tzph/XXDC-Pediatrician-vaccines-top-tzph-mediumSquareAt3X.jpg", "Source": "nytimes.com", "PublishedAt": "2026-10-05T15:46:37+00:00", "SiblingHeadlines": [{"HeadlineId": "d4edab8f", "Headline": "Measles Endorses Paxton, Cites 'Steady Leadership' and Open-Door Policy in West Texas", "Angle": "Reversal: Measles endorses Paxton", "Rank": 7, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "05fbb6ae", "Headline": "Paxton Seeks Immunity From Justice, Denies It To Toddlers", "Angle": "Pun on 'immunity'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "0b174157", "Headline": "8-Month-Old Charlotte Subpoenaed as Material Witness, Thighs Entered Into Evidence", "Angle": "Absurdist: the infant as star witness in the profit conspiracy", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "107f109c", "Headline": "Standard of Care Update: Lollipop for the Baby, Retainer Fee for the Doctor", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: the post-shot goodie bag", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "23e4b1fc", "Headline": "Doctors Urged To Stay Current On Boosters And Grand Jury Appearances", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: CDC childhood immunization schedule", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "2525f596", "Headline": "AG Who Escaped Trial Without A Lawyer Now Prosecuting Syringes", "Angle": "Pun on 'immunity'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "26c4316f", "Headline": "Measles Campaign Spokesperson: 'Two Buried in West Texas and Paxton Still Hasn't Called, But We Forgive Him'", "Angle": "Reversal: Measles endorses Paxton", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "2b03f865", "Headline": "Texas Well-Child Visits Now Include Vaccine, Vitals, and a Fucking Subpoena Contingency Plan", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: the post-shot goodie bag", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "2c518eaf", "Headline": "Daycare Teacher Named Co-Conspirator for Noticing Infant 'Never Gets Sick'", "Angle": "Absurdist: the infant as star witness in the profit conspiracy", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "3307c7a5", "Headline": "Chunky, Healthy 9-Month-Old Discharged With Clean Bill of Health and One Lawyer's Phone Number", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: the post-shot goodie bag", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "3b299104", "Headline": "Local Measles Outbreak Issues Press Release: 'Finally, A Senator Who Gets Us'", "Angle": "Reversal: Measles endorses Paxton", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "3ebcfbc0", "Headline": "Pediatricians Report Rare Side Effect From MMR Shot: Paxton Subpoena", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: CDC childhood immunization schedule", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "4433cce0", "Headline": "Investigators Grill Charlotte, 8 Months, Baby Reportedly 'Not Cooperating,' Just Giggling", "Angle": "Absurdist: the infant as star witness in the profit conspiracy", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "56da8344", "Headline": "New Patient Welcome Kit: Sticker, Lollipop, Pediatrician's Criminal Defense Attorney's Fucking Business Card", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: the post-shot goodie bag", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "6da6c8a0", "Headline": "Paxton: Immunity For Me, Not For Thee", "Angle": "Pun on 'immunity'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "95920b53", "Headline": "Paxton's Office: Baby's Healthy Thighs 'Consistent With Illicit Gains'", "Angle": "Absurdist: the infant as star witness in the profit conspiracy", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "c2136059", "Headline": "Man Who Dodged Impeachment Mad Kids Are Dodging Measles", "Angle": "Pun on 'immunity'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "c67552a0", "Headline": "New Pediatric Schedule: 2 Months DTaP, 4 Months Subpoena, 12-15 Months Disbarment Booster", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: CDC childhood immunization schedule", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "dd08fb4e", "Headline": "Virus PAC Praises Paxton's 'Solid Record' of Keeping Clinics Busy and Kids Unprotected", "Angle": "Reversal: Measles endorses Paxton", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "e57c299d", "Headline": "Recommended Immunization Schedule Now Includes Civil Investigative Demand At 4 Months", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: CDC childhood immunization schedule", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}]}, {"HeadlineId": "884dfbda", "Headline": "Poll: 74% Say Country Is On Wrong Track, Plan To Re-Elect Whoever's Fucking It Up", "OriginalHeadline": "Midterm Elections: Who Is Winning the Race for Congress? Latest Data", "ShowOriginal": false, "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: incumbency rate vs. wrong-track polling", "AngleSetup": "This puts the real paradox into immaculate polling-desk language. Voters overwhelmingly say the country is on the wrong track, yet they reliably re-elect over 90% of incumbents. The headline reads as straight AP poll copy until the clause where voters commit to keeping whoever is already 'fucking it up,' delivered as a neutral survey finding.", "Rank": 7, "YearMonthDay": "20261005", "StoryId": "hs7w9", "Description": "It\u2019s Oct. 5 \u2014 29 days away from the midterms. Here\u2019s the state of play.", "Url": "https://www.nytimes.com/2026/10/05/us/politics/midterm-elections-control-congress.html", "ImageUrl": "https://static01.nyt.com/images/2026/09/27/us/sotr-28sep-promo/sotr-28sep-promo-mediumSquareAt3X.jpg", "Source": "nytimes.com", "PublishedAt": "2026-10-05T13:55:10+00:00", "SiblingHeadlines": [{"HeadlineId": "884dfbda", "Headline": "Poll: 74% Say Country Is On Wrong Track, Plan To Re-Elect Whoever's Fucking It Up", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: incumbency rate vs. wrong-track polling", "Rank": 7, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "a6a8074c", "Headline": "With Race Deadlocked, Trump Unilaterally Rounds Up To Landslide", "Angle": "Dark satire: 'too close to call' / Trump", "Rank": 20, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "0448e1b6", "Headline": "Nation's Fate Narrows to One Driveway as Super PACs Open Bidding War in Norfolk", "Angle": "Absurdist SimCity: last undecided voter in Norfolk", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "12eacf17", "Headline": "Congress Midterm Report Cards Mailed: 'Conduct Unbecoming' Across The Board", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: school midterm report card", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "23a5885c", "Headline": "Local Man Demands 'Something Tangible' From Congress, Analysts Call It Unprecedented", "Angle": "Absurdist SimCity: last undecided voter in Norfolk", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "325e2f75", "Headline": "Teacher Notes 'Does Not Apply Himself, See Last 40 Report Cards' On Democratic Caucus", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: school midterm report card", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "3642e0cc", "Headline": "In Stunning Methodological Breakthrough, Trump Eliminates Uncertainty By Declaring Winner Himself", "Angle": "Dark satire: 'too close to call' / Trump", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "49e7d08e", "Headline": "New Numbers: Nation Agrees Things Are Bad, Agrees Even More On Not Doing Anything About It", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: incumbency rate vs. wrong-track polling", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "73678e07", "Headline": "Parent-Teacher Conference Scheduled For Nov. 3rd \u2014 Voters Still Deciding Whether To Show Up", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: school midterm report card", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "874ef38d", "Headline": "Pollsters Confirm: Electorate's Gut Feeling Is Mostly Just Gut Feeling", "Angle": "Pun on 'toss-up'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "8d4a1869", "Headline": "29 Days Out: Voters Undecided Between Candidates, Also Just Undecided About Lunch", "Angle": "Pun on 'toss-up'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "93f6d4b7", "Headline": "Norfolk Man Polled Hourly, Mailbox Collapses Under Flyer Weight, Still 'Undecided'", "Angle": "Absurdist SimCity: last undecided voter in Norfolk", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "b39b9069", "Headline": "Cook Political Report Downgrades Swing Seats From 'Queasy' to 'Toss-Up'", "Angle": "Pun on 'toss-up'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "bd8e9c83", "Headline": "Survey Finds Voters Furious With Direction Of Country, Will Change Nothing About Who's Driving", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: incumbency rate vs. wrong-track polling", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "c4075b94", "Headline": "Entire Midterm Polling Apparatus Now Just One Guy in Norfolk Named Gary", "Angle": "Absurdist SimCity: last undecided voter in Norfolk", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "d368b5c1", "Headline": "Latest Data: 91% Incumbent Re-Election Rate Holds Steady Among Voters Who Hate Incumbents", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: incumbency rate vs. wrong-track polling", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "e3370c6a", "Headline": "Race Too Close To Call, So Trump Calls It Himself, 29 Days Early", "Angle": "Dark satire: 'too close to call' / Trump", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "f2f8f7cc", "Headline": "Nation's Stomach Rated 'Toss-Up' As 29 Districts Officially Throw Up", "Angle": "Pun on 'toss-up'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "f4309166", "Headline": "Pollsters Cite Margin Of Error; Trump Cites Margin Of Victory", "Angle": "Dark satire: 'too close to call' / Trump", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "f77300c8", "Headline": "GOP Earns 'Chief Of The Playground,' Dems Score Steady C-Minus, Nation Grounds Everyone", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: school midterm report card", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}]}, {"HeadlineId": "1ddc93be", "Headline": "Justices Rule Plaintiffs Lack Standing, Will Revisit Once They're Treading Water", "OriginalHeadline": "Supreme Court Begins Term With Major Climate Case", "ShowOriginal": false, "Angle": "Pun on legal 'standing'", "AngleSetup": "The Court tosses climate cases on standing, the doctrine that you have to show concrete, particular harm before you can sue. The joke takes the word literally: the justices will reconsider once the plaintiffs are no longer standing but treading water. It works aloud, and the legal hairsplitting becomes a death sentence delivered in procedural language.", "Rank": 13, "YearMonthDay": "20261005", "StoryId": "rp25s", "Description": "Also, consider these 100 big unanswered questions. Here\u2019s the latest at the end of Monday.\n\n[Photo: Demonstrators at the Supreme Court today.]", "Url": "https://www.nytimes.com/2026/10/05/briefing/supreme-court-climate-middle-east-oil.html", "ImageUrl": "https://static01.nyt.com/images/2026/10/05/multimedia/05evening-supreme-court-01-wlgv/05evening-supreme-court-01-wlgv-mediumSquareAt3X.jpg", "Source": "nytimes.com", "PublishedAt": "2026-10-05T21:50:15+00:00", "SiblingHeadlines": [{"HeadlineId": "a3f65f0e", "Headline": "Doctors List Earth As 'Critical But Stable Enough To Wait Nine Months For A Hearing'", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: hospital triage chart", "Rank": 11, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "be4553ab", "Headline": "Roberts Assures Nation Court Will Take Thoughtful, Measured Approach To Whether Everyone Is Fucked", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: 'thoughtful' judicial temperament", "Rank": 11, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "dcf58046", "Headline": "Chief Justice Cites Judicial Restraint, Centuries Of Precedent, In Ruling On Whether We're Fucked", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: 'thoughtful' judicial temperament", "Rank": 12, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "1ddc93be", "Headline": "Justices Rule Plaintiffs Lack Standing, Will Revisit Once They're Treading Water", "Angle": "Pun on legal 'standing'", "Rank": 13, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "e1665730", "Headline": "In Unanimous Show Of Collegiality, Justices Agree To Disagree On Just How Fucked We Are", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: 'thoughtful' judicial temperament", "Rank": 16, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "64dad9f2", "Headline": "ER Admits Patient Earth, Age 4.5 Billion, Condition Critical; Oral Argument Scheduled For Spring", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: hospital triage chart", "Rank": 18, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "e2626af2", "Headline": "Court Opens Term With Careful Deliberation On The Narrow Question Of How Fucked, Exactly", "Angle": "Deadpan profanity: 'thoughtful' judicial temperament", "Rank": 18, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "ae4d2c34", "Headline": "Court Demands 'Concrete Injury' From Climate Plaintiffs, Suggests Checking Back Once Coastline Does", "Angle": "Pun on legal 'standing'", "Rank": 19, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "04e44a1d", "Headline": "Nine Unelected Lifetime Appointees Weigh In On A Climate They Will Not Personally Experience", "Angle": "Circumlocution: the justices' actuarial tables", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "1d4a5d2b", "Headline": "Court's 6-3 Majority: Lopsided On Land, Also On The Water", "Angle": "Dark satire: gift-funded justices on 'lopsided' court", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "2f777c67", "Headline": "Panel Whose Combined Life Expectancy Is Shorter Than Your Mortgage Rules On The 2080s", "Angle": "Circumlocution: the justices' actuarial tables", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "557457ca", "Headline": "Supreme Court Boldly Decides Future It Will Be Dead Before It Matters", "Angle": "Circumlocution: the justices' actuarial tables", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "60a57298", "Headline": "Justices Hear Major Climate Case From Graciously Provided Deck Chairs", "Angle": "Dark satire: gift-funded justices on 'lopsided' court", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "611da97a", "Headline": "Patient Flatlines, Court Calendars Flex: 'We've Got An Opening In June'", "Angle": "Format-borrowing: hospital triage chart", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "7aaf39c4", "Headline": "Supreme Court Begins Term, Lists Heavily To Starboard", "Angle": "Dark satire: gift-funded justices on 'lopsided' court", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "961c21f6", "Headline": "SCOTUS Tosses Climate Suit on Standing Grounds, Advises Plaintiffs to Reapply From Higher Ground", "Angle": "Pun on legal 'standing'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "a15cdbc9", "Headline": "Supreme Court: No Standing, No Case \u2014 Floaties Not Accepted as Evidence", "Angle": "Pun on legal 'standing'", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "cedbc336", "Headline": "Undisclosed Yacht Casts Deciding Vote In Climate Case, Sources Say", "Angle": "Dark satire: gift-funded justices on 'lopsided' court", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "d0877a22", "Headline": "Actuarial Tables, Not Ideology, Guide Today's Climate Ruling, Experts Suspect", "Angle": "Circumlocution: the justices' actuarial tables", "Rank": null, "YearMonthDay": "20261005"}, {"HeadlineId": "d6e9b8aa", "Headline": "Hospital Sets Time Of Death; 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